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ABUSE MAGAZINE Parents and teens can bridge the communication gap with a little patience and a healthy measure of R-E-S-P-E-C-T. A parent’s view of speech development: it begins in infancy, blossoms in childhood, and stops dead in its tracks at adolescence. A teenager’s view of speech development: “My parents don’t understand a word I’m saying.” You don’t need a degree in communications to know that parents and teenagers seem to spend more time talking at and past one another than to or with one another. Chalk it up to different agendas, the stress of daily life, or familiarity breeding contempt. Whatever the 1. Try to understand the situation reason, adolescents and their folks are as good from your parents’ point of view. at making conversation as the construction crew If your goal is to be allowed to at the Tower of Babel. stay out later on Saturday night, For Teenagers What can you do to communicate better? Our experts offer these tips both parents and teenagers: For Parents 1. Don’t lecture your teen, have a conversation. When parents complain “my teenager doesn’t want to talk to me,” what they’re really complaining about is “my teenager doesn’t want to listen to me.” Conversation involves at least two people. 2. Don’t attack. “The conversation between any two people will break down if one of the two is put on the defensive and made to feel he’s being accused of something.” 3. Show respect for your teen’s opinions. Teenagers can be surprisingly easy to talk with if the parents make it clear that they’re listening to the teen’s point of view. 4. Keep it short and simple. “Almost every parent says at least 50% more than he or she should. Shut up. Remember when you were a teen and your parents lectured at you? And you thought, ‘Will you please stop; I already got the point!’ Stop before your teen gets there.” We are proud to help lay a strong ABUSE FREE foundation for our youth! for example, try to anticipate what they are concerned about, such as your safety and your whereabouts. 2. Address their concerns honestly and directly. Try saying something like, “If I am allowed to stay out later, I will tell you in advance where I’m going to be so you know how to reach me,” or “I’ll call you to let you know what time I’m going to be home, and that way you won’t have to worry about it.” 3. Don’t go on the defensive. If you feel deeply about the subject of the conversation -- clothes, friends, politics, sex, drugs, whatever -- stick to your guns, but listen to what your parents have to say. Craig’s Appliance Repair 1026 18th Ave. - Lewiston, ID 208-413-0623 Helping support preventative education for our youth and repair our youths future! 4. Don’t criticize or ridicule their viewpoints. Show them and their opinions the respect you want them to give you. 5. Make requests. Don’t issue a list of demands. 6. Make “I” statements. Explain your concerns by saying things such as “I feel you’re not being fair.” Or, “I feel like you’re not listening to my side.” Avoid “you” statements, such as “You don’t know wh