A
fter ressurection, all revived mummies share one wish: to continue to live
their former lives. This can cause some minor difficulty when we take into
account that these mummies have been dead for up to three thousand years,
they do not speak a word of our language and they were once wealthy and
demanding people of importance. We may often find that the sole desire of the revived
mummy is to unleash ancient plagues, remove our vital organs, worship cats and
enslave the Jews. Therefore, it is best to approach mummies with the utmost civility,
gesturing broadly, before getting too close, in order to communicate our intentions.
Clear communications can ensure that we can return the mummy to its resting place
calmly and peaceably -- and we, ourselves, can return to our rest knowing that we will
avoid any unpleasant plague of frogs that might interrupt our evening toilette.
Fig. 03.
Fig. 04.
ISS ALTHEA places her arms behind her head and clasps her hands
behind her back with her toes pointed outward.
This indicates to the mummy that there was
too much cinnamon in the muffins.
ISS MABEL places her heels and
toes together, hands raised above her
head in a diving position while bending slightly at the waist. This indicates to the mummy
that she is angry about gentrification.
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M