50 Years of Umko 1966 - 2016 1966 - 2016 | Page 40

“the Approaches”, “No’s. 1 through 8”, “No Name”, “the Waterfall” and of
course “Goodenough’s Weir”.
They set off in the same batch as Debbie’s parents Ric and Colleen
Whitton who were racing for the mixed double title, whereas Pete & Debbie
were just there “to complete the race”. After a swim below No.1 “to settle
the butterflies in my stomach” they stopped for Pete to put his spare contact
lenses in and try to fix his sunglasses. And who should they bump into on the
bank but Mom & Dad! They had come short in No.3 with Colleen enjoying
a massive swim with their now buckled boat while “my father found that
running down the bank shouting instructions to my mother was far easier
then swimming down the rapid with her!” This story of their “No.3” swim
would turn into family Umko folklore in the coming years. Their boat was a
wreck, folded in numerous places. “My father was searching in the bushes
for sticks to use as splints, my mother wasn’t saying much. You could cut
the tension in the air with a knife. We offered to help, but could see we
were standing in the middle of a battlefield. Once my captain’s vision was
restored, we gave them our roll of duct tape and tube of Genkem and left
the scene.”
Debbie ends modestly, “The rest of our race was uneventful and I
completed my first ever Umko. What a sense of accomplishment I felt when
I reached the finish line”. Debbie’s just too polite to trumpet “I beat my Dad!” or
“We won the mixed doubles!” so it had to be added in here without her permission.

A puzzling note on safety precautions: Once personal flotation devices
(PFD’s, or simply “lifejackets”) and helmets became compulsory paddlers
took comfort in wearing them and many believe they have been helped by
them at some stage or another, if only for warmth and protection against
water hitting them in the chest. Which makes you wonder: They were
never BANNED, so why didn’t paddlers wear them voluntarily? Some
did, but most “couldn’t” or “wouldn’t dare” - fearing peer pressure more
than drowning! It must also be noted however (Charles Mason reminded
us) that the few commercially available lifejackets back in the day were
uncomfortable and ineffectual, one puncture from a thorn bush and they
went all soggy!

Boats

For a long time in SA modified flatwater racing craft have been used on river
races. In the Umko they are probably used on the biggest and most technical
rapids anywhere. Usually, racing on rough swift-current waters is done in
whitewater boats over much shorter distances. Among the first boats used
on the Umko were Accords and Limfjordens - originally Olympic sprint
boats, they were designed by Jørgen Samson for Struer of Denmark - as that
Viking Rowan Rasmussen will be quick to remind us! Nowadays the craft
used are still sleek racing craft, though they may have higher-volume decks
and re-inforced hulls. Ironically, as boats have got more and more anorexic
over time, Limfys and Accords are now seen as slow and well-suited to big
water, but still only because paddlers are racing not tripping on the river.
The reason for the drive for ever-faster craft is the flat sections between rapids
- true bigwater boats are slow on flat water and river races in South Africa
are first and foremost races for the very competitive canoeing fraternity. So
the idea is to get to the next rapid (the one that Big B Longley says is the only
rapid on the Umko that he fears!) as quickly as possible. Then to sneak it,
bomb it, survive it and (admit it), sometimes even to portage around it, but
one way or another to get past it unscathed ahead of your rivals.

Rescued by a sweep just below No.1 - 1987

Rowan Rasmussen tells Ali Maynard “You are right about lifejackets Ali.
I think the first time we were required to use them was after the very full
Umko year. And don’t talk about helmets or sweeps!
I think we approached races with a fatalistic sense of acceptance - a bit
like the gunners below decks at Trafalgar - Nihilistic idiots! Nothing like the
modern destroyers with drones, missiles, and fighter cover to protect them
(today’s Umko helicopter?).”
Charles Mason had scurried around just before the ‘72 race and found
“possibly the last lifejacket in Durban.”
Robbie Stewart said “Those were the days! I don’t remember ever being

Lifejackets were known well before the Titanic sank in 1912. In fact, a
Frenchman made one out of cork in 1757 and an Englishman patented his
idea in 1765. In 1852 the US Congress passed a law that passenger steamboats
on the nation’s placid rivers carry a life preserver for every passenger. In
1875 a Scot demonstrated in Aberdeen that they work. And in 1973, thanks
to Charles Mason and Robbie Stewart being spotted wearing them on that
raging, roaring 1972 Umko, they gained a glimmer of “perhapsness”. But
only a glimmer.
Nowadays they’re standar d fare, compulsory along with helmets (and
of course proper boat buoyancy) and we can only scratch our heads at what
took us so long? Still, cricketers only started using helmets 100 years after
inventing ball-boxes. Testosterone is a strange juice!

UMKO 50 Years

©Jon Ivins

On Safety

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