2nd Edition June 2014 | Page 16

Lifestyle By Bolaji Yusuf THE MORNING AFTER: I PSHYCOLOGICAL EFFECTS OF BUGLARY t was a strange night and I can remember thinking to myself, why was the wind standing still like it was scared, that was my thought as I locked the doors and went on to chatting the night away with my earpiece drowning out all the ‘eeriness’ and saying a silent prayer to God to touch the heart of NEPA sorry PHCN to restore power, thinking back I don’t think that should have been my prayer point. Some moments later I thought I heard a loud thud somewhere not far away from our apartment, I listened for some minutes, hearing nothing else I proceeded to sleep, almost at the same time I saw a flash of light move across the window, that made my heart skip and the ‘oddness’ I was so quick to dismiss hit me with a nine ton sledge hammer which thirty minutes later slammed away the ironic burglary proof that was so intently placed on the windows. Slam! Slam!! and the silence of the night was shattered as the burglary proof came crashing down on the living room floor and in came three goons, who reveling in their obvious criminality started to search the house, at this moment I was with my family in the room and even though this wasn’t my first encounter my head went into an action freeze, I was totally numb and had no idea what to do, they obviously had the electricity company on their side because with the total darkness we were backed into a corner, we had no idea what they held as weapons and we had more kids than adults in the house, we were forced to make a choice of making a blind stand against these goons or protecting the kids, we gave in to the later, and that was how we got robbed on that day. What a story right? Believe me that night was one when I desperately wished; I was a secret 007, unfortunately not. Nights after I formed the habit of not sleeping till after 3 am, I really won’t want to admit that it was because I was scared but let’s leave it at; I was angry, really angry. I kept thinking back to that night and a million and one possibilities of what I could have done to change the outcome of that night which included the untimely loss of my Lumia phone. I began to think about the effects it had on everyone, even my cousin became obsessiv ely security conscious. Well this is months away and I still find it hard to sleep, I thought probably sharing would help ease this 16 | Choice Options psychological scar. How to Move On Burglary can be defined as illegal entry of a Now that you know the stages, the next step building with intent to commit a crime, espe- is to conquer them. Here are some things you cially theft, when someone burglarizes your can (and should) do to get over your burglary: home; the worst consequence is not the loss of your material possessions. After all, these can 1. Get Support be replaced, and any monetary loss may be Support can be found through numerous avecovered by your insurance. Rather, the worst nues, including friends, family members, cleraftermath comes in the form of psychological gy members, or a therapist. Don’t be afraid effects. If your home is broken into, you may to lean on others for emotional support and find yourself victim to any of the comfort. following emotional repercussions; 2. Let Yourself Feel Never Feeling Safe Don’t let others minimize your feelings by sayAll the safeguards you had put in place and ing things like, “Good thing you weren’t hurt,” trusted before– door and window locks, pos- or “You were lucky. At least they didn’t destroy sibly burglary proof, or your dog– failed you your sofa.” Just because you weren’t hurt or and let an intruder in. When might they fail all of your items weren’t set ablaze does not again? You may find yourself unable to sleep mean that you shouldn’t feel anything. You at night, fearful that someone will break in. have been victimized – it’s okay to be upset You may find that every little noise, even what about it. turns out to be your house creaking or spouse getting up for a glass of water, awakens suspi- 3. Do Not Give in to Fear cion. Post-traumatic stress disorder is a rather While it’s perfectly normal to feel afraid, don’t extreme, debilitating mental illness defined let it control you. Take action to protect and very specifically by psychologists and is only empower yourself. Consider installing a seculikely to occur after extremely stressful or life- rity alarm system in your home and enrolling threatening situations (such as combat or hos- in self-defense classes. tage situations). 4. Keep Your Routine Nightmares- Especially with Children Try to get back into a routine as soon as you Children can be profoundly impacted by a can. The more normalcies you have in your break-in. They already have a tendency to blur life, the easier it will be to move past this event. reality and fiction; children fear monsters in the closet, ghosts, and anything that scary. They 5. Take Care of Yourself internalize fear presented to them and pick up Don’t give into self-pity. Continue to eat well cues from adults about what to fear, but lack and exercise and don’t overindulge in food, the maturity to properly assess risks. Therefore, drugs or alcohol. You are stronger than a to a child who witnessed a home invasion, a break in. Don’t let a burglar rob you of your burglar may become the monster in the closet. good health and mental well-being. While it may not seem like it right now, you Re-victimization will be able to move past the negative feelings According to a 2005 report issued by Victim associated with the burglary. Allow yourself Support and Direct Line, one out of every four the freedom to move through these emotional homes that have been burglarized is targeted stages and remind yourself that this, too, shall for burglary again. This number doesn't ex- pass. actly put burglary victims at ease, especially The most important aspect is investing in your considering that burglars are people who may house and making sure you get a house in have been in the home before or have some a safe and secure ENVIRONMENT, when kind of connection with the home or home- searching for a house you need to take into owners. Based on this report, it's common for consideration the level of security that can be homeowners to not feel the same sense of se- provided, making sure that your neighborhood curity within their home that they once did, for and its surroundings are made up of people months, years or even the rest of their lives. who have good reputation and well meaning.