The truth is , I have not thought about anything else since that horrific day , when we learned that murderous mobs had killed innocent people in Israel while they were just living their lives in their homes and communities .
I feel that it is finally time for me to be untethered from the Diaspora , open my heart , and to be connected more deeply to Israel , or more correctly and honestly , to make the cares and concerns of Israel just as much a focus and priority for me as that which I have for American political and cultural matters .
My trip to Israel in December 2023 , was intense , meaningful , and gratifying . It was heavy but heartwarming . We carried home so much grief but also the knowledge that Israelis are both shuddering at what the future will be and perhaps more significantly rising to the occasion to create organizations and projects designed to supplement what the government just cannot get to because of the massive scale of the mobilization and the needs which have arisen .
I will never be the same person after this trip . What I saw at Kibbutz Kfar Aza was beyond the beyond . It was harder to absorb than my fifteen years doing hospice chaplaincy . The magnitude of the evil is beyond comprehension in America . It only begins to be real when you walk in the steps of the murderers and the victims . Our eyes saw a huge number of burned-out homes and innumerable bullet holes especially in the area where the young teens and twenties lived . There is no escaping the remnants of the murderous spree which until then had only been imagined . The pain and loss and emotional and spiritual impact on me / us were magnified by the banners hung from homes which
132