EYES ‘ Lesbian is an ugly word .’ ~ Cis woman , lesbian ( She / Her )
Sometimes I have doll eyes . The eyeballs look like glass . Animated marbles . I scrutinise my face and wonder if there are any worthy thoughts behind my eyes . But I only see doll eyes staring back . Big and round , housed in an empty skull with endless echoes . Why is it that my insides are vacant and limitless yet on the outside I take up too much space ? The world has no room for me . The world has no place for me . So , I waste away in dead places : decomposing in sewers , whistling under damp bridges , swimming between canal locks and crawling beneath floorboards with the rats .
You ’ ll find me bent double with my head between my knees ; my bones poking out beneath a thin sliver of skin . I shrink until there is nothing left but the jagged corners of my skeleton and weak puffs of breath .
I still think about her .
My eyes have adjusted to existing in these black places . Despite the gloomy days and inky nights , my eyes see clearly . I look at myself like I ’ m cattle . My destiny is the