Transforming TRAUMA
Newport Beach resident Kelly Roberts escaped a life of domestic abuse for one dedicated to helping others .
BY ASHLEY RYAN
Kelly Roberts ( front ) and her husband , Todd , pictured at the Human Options headquarters in Irvine
Originally a Midwest girl , Kelly Roberts came to California in her youth . “ I spent a lot of time at the beach , especially here in Newport , growing up ,” she says . “ It was my favorite place .”
After a few years working as a cosmetologist , she decided to go to college , then worked in the hotel industry before transitioning to event planning . But much of what she had planned for her life was put on hold when she fell into an abusive relationship . Though not her first , the experience stripped her of her confidence and self-worth .
Able to eventually flee to safety by staying with a friend — who is now her husband , Todd — Roberts channels her trauma into good , volunteering with Human Options , a nonprofit that aids victims of domestic violence . Aside from her work for the group ’ s around-the-clock hotline , she and her husband have launched Christmas for a Cause , a donation-based campaign around the holidays . So far , funds have gone to projects like a new playground at the Human Options emergency shelter as well as the renovation of a two-bedroom unit for a family in need , accomplished in partnership with her church , Bayside Orange County . This winter ’ s fundraising efforts will go toward further renovations , until all 16 of the units at the second-step shelter are upgraded .
“ Our lives have come full circle ,” Roberts notes . “ We moved down to Newport Beach and now my kids get to enjoy this place that I never imagined I would end up . So it ’ s a really good ending — not that it ’ s quite ended yet .”
Here , discover more about what Roberts endured , how she turned it into good through her work with Human Options and her advice for those struggling to step out of their own abusive relationships .
NEWPORT BEACH MAGAZINE : What are some early signs of abuse that people can look out for in their own relationships ? KELLY ROBERTS : An abuser and victim , they don ’ t really have a stereotype or a ZIP code or a demographic . My first abuser was a punk rocker teenager with not a penny to his name and my last abuser was a professional , suit-wearing man . But the signs are virtually the same . When it starts out , it ’ s just a relationship going super fast , super intense — a ton of compliments , grand gestures and presents . … After you ’ re feeling secure and pretty good about yourself , that ’ s when the isolation starts . The distancing you from your family , your friends , activities and things you love to do . … And then … the lies start coming . Lies and deceit and things you know in your heart are not right . … And that ’ s when the other abuses would start to come in . Not just physically , but financial and even spiritual . … It ’ s really just taking away the self .
THIS PAGE : ASHLEY RYAN ; OPPOSITE PAGE : JOHN HYRKAS
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